Two people doing the exact same thing can get wildly different results.
Notice how you respond differently to a salesperson genuinely interested in connecting with you, vs one who’s asking the exact same questions in an effort to convince you to buy what they’re selling. Feel how attracted you are to someone who’s happy with who they are and genuinely interested in getting to know you better, vs someone who’s insecure and approaching you in hopes of winning your approval. Imagine two people asking for the exact same favor; one of them thinks it’s normal and natural to ask for help, the other asks begrudgingly, silently shaming themselves for not being able to do it on their own.
Same actions, different motivations. Which ones are you more likely to respond positively to?
The thing the latter person in each example has in common is that even if you give them what they want, they’re less likely to genuinely thank you for it. Because they’re not actually motivated by their true desires (connection, curiosity, ease), but by some approximation that they hope will bring them closer to their desires (more money, approval, pushing through).
That true desire makes the difference between inspiration and desperation. Both are perfectly valid forms of motivation, but one of them gives you energy while the other expends it.
When I write from a place of trying to be perfect, writing is hard. I’m not motivated by helping people or expressing myself (energy giving), I’m motivated by avoiding criticism and shame (energy expending).
When I write as an act of discovering the words that want to flow through me, it’s a joy. I bring curiosity instead of criticism. The creative process becomes an act of letting love flow through me, rather than a trial to prove my worth.
I can focus on the action and push myself to write every day no matter what. Or I can focus on the motivation and discovering what would actually inspire me to love the daily ritual of writing.
The sweet spot is to commit to taking action in a loving way. If I’m going to write every day no matter what, it’s no longer a question of what I’m choosing to do, but how much I’m willing to love myself along the way.